Formatted by: Arabella Fourneau
Written by: Dylan Randel
It is impossible to be the oldest of five kids. We are the firstborns, the “heirs” to the throne, and all we get is a slap on the back and sometimes not even. We always have to be a role model, but we’re always the bad example.
We need to be polite; when we aren’t we’re punished, but when one of our younger siblings is rude, they’re left untouched, free to do as they please. We need to pick up our rooms, while our parents take care of our siblings’ room(s). We are always leading our siblings, but it’s never in the right direction. We need to always respect those older than us, but we don’t get any respect from those younger than us. We need to always stick up for our siblings, but then they’ll throw us under the bus at the drop of a hat. We need to always have goals and reach them without help, while younger siblings instead ride coattails. We have to find a way to make our own money, while our siblings get allowances. We have to answer for our siblings’ bad behavior, which is insane but if we point it out then we are the ones at fault.
You have been taught lessons and discipline. You have time limits, punishments, restrictions, stress, responsibility, and work ethics. And your siblings, well they have none of that, no time limit, no punishments, no restrictions, no stress or responsibility, and no work ethics.
It’s not possible to be a good older sibling. There’s no reward or reason, other than it’s just what you’re supposed to do. You know that the oldest sibling used to be the most praised, they were the heirs to the throne and all of the kingdom. Now, they are test subjects, experiments for their parents to study how their parenting will affect their child. We are life’s rough draft, there are no redos, and you’re stuck with what comes out after 18 years.
I’m sick of it. I am tired of always being so underappreciated for what I do, for what we do. Our lives are like a house of mirrors with no exit, you may think you’re going the right way but then you hit a roadblock and need to make a complete 180. When we look into our reflection we are not greeted by ourselves, but rather by chains tying us to our siblings. We want to be independent, free from the burden of younger siblings, free from the daunting task of always caring for others, we want only the responsibility of caring for ourselves. Instead, we put up with it, and we learn to live with all of this, all the punishments, the stress, and the work, and I guess that is what makes an older sibling an “older sibling.”